Newspapers Are Important
Circle Ten Council
onto stage talking among themselves about how their parents get the papers every
day. One boy might indicate that his dad picks it up off the porch every
morning while another laments that their delivery is always in the bushes.
Another points out that it is full of important information like sport scores
and stock prices. Finally, they all shake their heads in agreement and face the
Cub # 1:
My parents told me that the newspaper is the
most important thing we get in our house!
Cub # 2:
Yeah, if my dad didn’t get the paper, he
wouldn’t have anything to put under the car to soak up the oil in the garage.
Cub # 3:
That’s really important, but my mom has to get
the paper so she has something to clean the windows when we can’t see through
Cub # 4:
I didn’t know how important newspapers were
until last summer. My folks told me that if they didn’t get the paper, they
would have anything to put under the steamed crabs!
Cub # 5:
No Kidding! And if my mom didn’t get the paper,
I don’t know what she’d put under the kitty litter!
Cub # 6:
Well, they’re right, you know! If my dad didn’t
use the newspaper on the dining room table, my mom night find out and then she
wouldn’t let him spray paint my pinewood derby there.
ALL See? Newspapers
are really important!
The Hoot ‘N Holler
EDITOR: dressed in shirt sleeves and an eyeshade.
wears fedora hat with sign “Reporter” pushed back on his head.
dressed as “yuppie”
dressed in work cloths carrying a clothes line.
wears fedora hat, loud tie, & suit.
“Sherlock Holmes” hat & carries magnifying glass.
wears sweater and slacks, and has long white beard.
CUB REPORTER: wears
jeans and fedora hat and carries a teddy bear.
Two desks: One with “Editor” sign and a shadow box at each side labeled “Incoming”
and “Outgoing.” The other desk is for the reporter. Put two or three phones on
Editor’s desk and a wastebasket beside it. Place a typewriter on Reporter’s
These are out of sight and set to go off at regular intervals during skit.
“The End” sign:
hidden behind Editor’s desk.
Ice Cream Scoop: carried by Copy Boy.
Flash Bulb Camera:
used by Walter Willtell.
The action takes place in the office of the “Hoot ‘N Holler Daily
Trombone.” The Editor is seated at his desk. The Reporter is pounding away at
his typewriter. Each time an alarm clock goes off, the Editor picks up a phone
and bellows “Hello!” and bangs the receiver down saying “Wrong number!” There
should be an air of hectic confusion throughout the skit.
Editor: (shouting) Copy Boy! (copy boy, paper
in band, comes dancing in like a real “hep” cat.)
Copy Boy: Yeah, Man - like, I’m a Copy-Cat! (Editor
snatches papers angrily; copy boy dances out.)
Reporter: (loudly) What’s the deadline? (Boy
enters with paper in band; gives it to reporter.) This is no deadline. This
is the obituary column! (Editor shakes bead in disgust.)
Copy Boy: Well, they’re all dead, aren’t they? (Reporter
gets up menacingly, as if to choke copy boy. Boy scurries away.)
Editor: I wish we’d get a good “scoop” just once!
Copy Boy: (running in with ice cream scoop) Here’s
one! (Editor snatches scoop and throws it at boy as be beats a hasty retreat,
Boy enters and takes papers from the “Outgoing” box and starts to put them into
Editor: (angrily) Who are
Office Boy: I’m the new office boy, Sir.
Editor: Well, get out of here and let my papers alone!
(grabs papers and puts them back in “Outgoing” box as office boy exits.)
Reporter: Where’s that linotypist?
Linotypist: (enters currying a piece of clothesline)
Cant’ find a linotypist, but here’s a piece of clothesline,
Reporter: I don’t want that. Get out of here! (Linotypist
exits as Proofreader enters. He hovers around Editor’s desk, examining
everything closely with the magnifying glass.)
Editor: What on earth are you doing here?
Proofreader: Who, me? I’m the proofreader, and I’m looking for
proof. (Editor holds his bead in anguish as -proofreader ambles off,
examining everything as be leaves.)
Editor: If this keeps up, we’ll have to stop the presses.
News! News! News! That’s what we need. Instead, what have we got? A proofreader
with a Sherlock Holmes complex. (Editor pounds fist on desk as be talks. He
pick up phone.) Hello! City Desk? Send me some news.
be has completed his call, be paces up and down behind his desk. Cub reporter
comes skipping in, carrying his teddy bear.)
Editor: Now, just tell me please, what have we here?
Cub Reporter: I’m your eager Cub Reporter. You asked for news,
and here I am. I am reporting on the cubs at the zoo. There are exactly four
Well, almost that is. Now there are only three. I brought one along.
Out! Out! Out! (holds bead and groans)
Oh for some news.
Reporter: Here comes Walter Willtell. Now we’ll get some
Walter Willtell: (enters, and speaks very rapidly) Good
evening, Ladies and Gentlemen and all the ships at sea! I’ll be back in a flash
with a flash! (He runs out, re-enters with camera and takes a flash picture
of the audience. Editor props “The End” sign in front of his desk.)
Six to eight players sit around a table scattered with papers, a couple of water
glasses, etc. They mime a discussion, some jotting down notes, etc. Enter the
narrator, outfitted as a news reporter. In confidential tones, the reporter
explains that this is an important meeting of the group committee, gathered on
this occasion to make some very important decisions.
narrator says something like, “Let’s see if we can get a bit closer to hear how
things are going”, the group at the table adds some mumbling and unintelligible
arguing to their mime. Occasionally, they punctuate the din with outbursts such
as, “No, no!”; “I disagree!”; “That’s better”; “No way!” “That might work” and
the hubbub dies, the group settles back. One member stands and announces, “Then
it’s decided; a 12-slice pizza with olives, mushrooms, lots of cheese, but hold
The Big Story
reporter enters the stage and complains that there is no news. He sees a cliff
and decides to jump off. He stands on the edge of the cliff ready to jump; he
begins to swing his arms and to count to three a....l...a...
As he gets
to two a second person runs on shouting STOP! What are you doing?
reporter explains. The second man decides that he’ll jump too, as he is the
sheriff of this small town and there is no crime and his cell is empty. As they
both prepare to jump a third man runs on...
2nd men explain what they are doing... . He decides that he will also jump
because he is a doctor with no patients.
dairy farmer runs on as he has an udder disaster because his herd has no milk.
Finally they all jump except for the reporter. . . he shouts excitedly, “wow!
Now I really have a story to write about! Four People jump from a cliff in mass
Circle Ten Council
Circle Ten had a take off on this skit with the
following characters – CD
Reporter who can’t find a story
Cub Scout whose Den Leader is
mad at him because his buddy burner backfired and nearly burned down her house.
Den Leader who planned the Cub
Scout Fair for my entire pack and their families. And then it rained, so they
had to move everything into her living room. Now there’s nothing left of her
Cubmaster who found the doors
to the church locked, the Pinewood Derby track broke down during the race, and
forgot the flags.
Gain everyone jumps except the
And the reporter runs off yelling,
“Now I’ve got a story!”
Sam Houston Area Council
Reporter: Good evening, ladies
and gentlemen. Here' s your roving reporter with another man-on-the-street
interview. Tonight we are going to talk about mountains. Here's a man right
here. How do you do, sir, can you tell me what is your impression of mountains?
First Man: "High!"
Reporter: Hi, yourself! Now
tell me, what is your impression of mountains?
First Man: Just like I
Reporter: Oh! Ha, ha, ha. My
mistake. When you said "High! ", I thought you said "Hi!” get it? Oh well,
let's talk to someone else. Here's a man. Tell me, sir, how do you feel about
Second Man: Well, I've
never been there, of course, but if I had to feel about mountains, I'd do like
always, feel with my fingers.
Reporter: Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Seems we have some jokesters about today. Well now, let's try our question on
this little boy here. Tell me, sonny, have you ever gone over the top of a
Small Boy: Yes, sir,
lots of times.
Reporter: My, I'm surprised to
hear that, must have been a hard trip for a youngster, actually to go clear over
the top of a mountain.
Small Boy: Oh! No, sir,
we were in an airplane.
Reporter: (to himself) This is
getting ridiculous, but I’ll try one more time. How do you do, sir, May I ask
you a question?
Third Man: Why sure,
what’s your Problem?
Reporter: Tell me, sir,
what’s your impression of life in the mountains?
Third Man: Well, from
what I hear, it's a lot like an umbrella.
Reporter: An umbrella? I don't
quite understand what you mean.
Third Man: Yup, like an
umbrella. Life in the mountains is either up or down.
Reporter: Sorry, folks, some
days you can't win.
Santa Clara County Council
Cub # 1:
You know the den leader’s birthday is coming up.
Cub # 2:
Yeah. We should do something for her.
Cub # 3:
Yeah. She is so much fun. Let’s give her a
Cub # 4:
I don’t have any money. Do you?
Cub # 5:
No. But we could earn some money.
Cub #1: Good idea! Let’s go ask Mr.
Smith. He’s real nice.
Boys walk up to house and knock on door
Cub #1: Hi, Mr. Smith. We are trying to
earn money to buy a present for our den leader.
Cub #2: Do you have any jobs we could do to
earn extra money?
Mr. Smith: Why, you boys came at just the right
time! I was just about to go around back and paint my porch. Do you think you
can handle that job?
Mr. Smith: OK, then. You’ll find everything you
need around back. Just knock on the front door if you have any questions.
All: Thanks, Mr. Smith!
Boys walk backstage behind house.
They return one at a time at ask questions then walk
Cub #1: (Knocks on door) Is this the paint
you wanted us to use, Mr. Smith?
Mr. Smith: Yes, that’s right. Thanks for checking
Cub #2: (Knocks on door) We saw these old
shirts in your garage, Mr. Smith. Is it OK if we wear them so we won’t get
paint on our uniforms?
Mr. Smith: Good idea! Glad to see you boys take
such pride in your uniforms.
Cub #3: (Knocks on door) Mr. Smith, do you
have some newspaper we could spread out in case we drip paint?
Mr. Smith: Sure--here you go! You boys certainly
are being careful.
Cub #4: (Knocks on door) Is it OK if we
close the windows so we don’t splatter paint inside?
Mr. Smith: Sure--go ahead. You boys think of
Cub #5: (Knocks on door) Did you want us
to paint the door, too, Mr. Smith?
Mr. Smith: Sure--the door could use a fresh coat
Boys all return together to knock on door
Cub #3: We’re all done now, Mr. Smith.
Cub #4: Would you like to come around back
and see how we did?
Mr. Smith: Oh no, that won’t be necessary. I
know you Cub Scouts always do your best! Here’s some money for each of you for
your hard work
All: Wow! Thanks, Mr. Smith!
Boys begin to walk away, then one turns back
Cub #5: Thanks again Mr. Smith. Oh, and by
the way. You don’t have a “Porche.” You have a Ferrari!
Southern NJ Council
One den member wears a sign reading
Another has a sign reading “Cat.”
All others wear signs reading “Mouse.”
with Mother mouse taking her children for a walk. (You may have to explain
Mother Mouse: Come children it’s a beautiful day
for a nice walk...
Other mice respond.
All making small talk while crossing the stage.
Suddenly Cat jumps into the path in front of the mice
Mother Mouse: (in a loud voice) Bow wow wow! Bow
The cat screeches in fear and runs off.
Mice: Oh, Mother, we were so
Mother Mouse: Let that be a lesson to you, children. It
pays to learn a second language.
LISTEN AT THE WALL
Southern NJ Council
Cub #1 walks along a wall just
listening, listening. Others come along and see him.
Cub #2: What do you hear?
Cub #1: (Dramatically) Listen!
Others listen. But they don’t seem to hear anything.
Cub #3: I don’t hear anything!
Cub #1: (More dramatically) Listen!
Cub #4: (In a disgusted voice) I don’t hear
Cub #1: (With a faraway look) You know, it’s
been that way all day.