SKITS

Survivor

CNJC council
John Brogan, Jr.
CM, ASM and CRTC HAD district,.

The premise of this skit, is to drag out a bit, some funny actions by players.

Props, tiki torches.

The scene, The survivor TV show. The host/mc challenges 4 to 6 players in a bunch of inane, silly gags/games (see examples below).  With each day¹s event ending with a meal, where each character picks the same meal.  Meal choices are limited to two, fried rats or steamed bug. Extinguish a lamp each time someone is voted off.  It is a must that the first 1-3 times that the skit be interesting enough to keep audience paying attention,  through actions and dialogue.  During the fourth run through, the campfire MC interrupts, saying excuse, Host (use his name), this skit, its interesting and all, but it just seems to have no point, its not going anywhere and I think the audience is getting bored, do you think you could get to the punch line?  Where upon the host, facing the audience says "Sure, MC (use real name) I was just trying to prove the point that 2 out of 3 survivors prefer fried rat over steamed bug. Groannnnn....

Examples of "survivor" activites"  have players pretend to swim among sharks, climb coconut trees, do the best hula dance, have a jungle drum competition, you get the idea. Vote the best person off, it will keep the audience enrapt at the outrage.

Boy Genius
Mt. Diablo Silverado

Characters: 3 or 4 Cubs (more is ok.)

Scene opens 1st Boy sitting on chair or bed with toys and clothes scattered all over.  He is deep in thought.  Several friends come in.

All: (Greet one another)

2nd Cub: "Hi ___ what are you doing?

lst Cub: Just thinking.

2nd Cub: "Thinking about what?"

1st Cub: "My invention."

3rd Cub: "Are you inventing something?"

1st Cub: "Sure, I want to be famous like Alexander Graham Bell or Thomas Edison."

4th Cub:   "What do you have in mind?  Maybe we can help.

All: "Sure"

1st Cub: "Okay, (getting up) First of all I need a big box.  There's one in my closet, ---I need 2 toy airplanes-then I'll need some kite string - last I need-some rags-You can use my clothes for that. okay, now put everything in the box. That takes care of it."

4th Cub:  "Takes care of what?"

1st Cub:   "My invention. I just invented a way to get my room cleaned before my Mom gets home.

Cub Scout Pledge to Himself
Skit or maybe a Closing
Mt. Diablo Silverado

Arrangement: Pack Flag is placed in center of stage. 10 Cubs, in uniform, in turn come on stage stand near Pack Flag and recite one of the lines. Upon finishing he salutes the flag and goes to the rear of the stage, where they form a horseshoe.

1. May I grow in character and ability as I grow in size

2. May I be honest with myself and others in what I do and say.

3. May I learn and practice my religion

4. May I always honor my parents, my elders and my leaders

5. May I develop high moral principles and the courage to live by them.

6. May I strive for health in body, mind and spirit

7. May I always respect the rights others.

8. May I set a good example so that others may enjoy and, profit from my company.

9. May I give honest effort to my work.

10. May I regard mv education as preparation for the future

(As last boy joins horseshoe-Boys join hands for Living Circle Repeat the Promise)

Skit
Mt. Diablo Silverado Council

Equipment: Cards with letters C-U-B S-C-O-U-T-S

Need: 9 Cub Scouts and a narrator -Cubs hold cards as they speak.

Narrator: Cub Scouts are eager and ambitious boys looking forward to making their mark in the world.  What will I be?

1st Cub: C could stand for Carpenter

2nd Cub: U A University Student

3rd Cub: B A Bus Driver.

4th Cub: S A Soccer Player

5th Cub: C A Computer Programmer

6th Cub: O An Office Worker

7th Cub: U A Uniformed Policeman.

8th Cub: T A Traffic Controller

9th Cub: S Could stand for Space - An astronaut, Scientist, Technician or maybe a Resident.

Narrator: As Cub Scouts we are thinking about our future. What will it be? The opportunities are never ending.

(If you don't have enough boys, one could hold 2 letters.  Narrator could be the Den Chief or Den Leader)

The Absentminded Drivers
Detroit Area Council

This skit can be altered to fit any number of boys.  Large cardboard cutouts of a boat, plane, rocket, etc., are on stage in full view of the audience.  Boys are dressed in appropriated costume.  As they speak their lines, the audience calls out the correct vehicle.

Narrator: We're slightly absentminded,
I've even forgotten my name.
Please help us find our vehicles
In our transportation game.

Pilot: I have a pair of goggles
(Plane)And a helmet on my head
While one of these belongs to me? (points to vehicles)
What was that you said?

Cowboy: My hat's about ten gallons
(Horse)I've spurs upon my books
I wear a kerchief 'round my neck
My yells I give in whoops.

Fireman: I guess I wear a helmet
(Fire Truck)      A rubber coat and boots
My vehicle is usually red
My siren has no toots.

Astronaut: My orbit is outside the Earth
(Rocket) Where silence is profound
And when my trip is over
I don't touch the ground

Sailor: Over the blue and bounding main

(Boat) Away, away I float
I wonder what I'm steering
Could it be a _____?

Engineer: I carry loads and people
(Train)              My engine's big and #674529
I go to far off places
I run upon a track.

Indian        My highways are the lakes and streams
(Canoe)      Over all the country wide
Sometimes I use a hollowed log,
Sometimes an animal hide.

Bus Driver: I carry people to their work
(Bus)And home again at night
I drive in any part of town
I'm yellow, shiny and bright.

When I Grow Up”
SHAC

Props: A large box the Cubs can step into and out, decorate front with knobs and dials.

Cast: Eight Cub Scouts.

Cub #1: Ladies and gentlemen, this is the fantastic terrific magic future machine.  By entering this machine you will know your future career.

Cub #2: Let me try it first

Cub #1: OK, enter the chamber (he turns dials on the front) Come out and reveal your future.  (This is repeated with each Cub)

Cub #2: Wow, I’m going to be a truck driver.  10-4 Good Buddy.

Cub #3: (enters then exits) Hey, I’m going to be a Chef, dinner anyone?

Cub #4: (enters then exits) I’m going to be a doctor, want a shot?

Cub #5: (enters then exits) A lawyer, I’m going to be a lawyer.  I think I’ll run for District Attorney.

Cub #6: (enters then exits) Yea, yea, yea!  I’m going to be a rock star, where’s my guitar?

Cub #7: (enters then exits) An astronaut, look at Mars!

Cub #8: I’m not so sure about this, but here it goes.

Cub #1: This way. (turns dials)

Cub #8: (enters then screams)  No!  No!

Cub #1: What’s the matter, what will you be?

Cub #8: No, I’ll be a (pause for silence) Cubmaster!!!  (Runs off the stage screaming)

“Job Search”
SHAC

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it.  Mainly because it was a so-so job.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was exhausting.
I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.
Then I tried to be a chef--figured it would add a little spice to my life but I just didn't have the thyme.
Finally, I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patients.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
Thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.
So then I got a job in a gymnasium (work-out-center), but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
Next, I found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking.

After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
You have any ideas for a job? Maybe you have something that Works, .because I don't.

I’m Glad I am A Cub Scout
SHAC

Boys line up on stage dressed as their character with their backs to the audience.  As each one does their part, he turns around and faces the crowd.  The second line for each is repeated twice (the second time all those who are facing the crowd repeat their line).

Chorus:  I’m glad I am a Cub Scout, as you can plainly see,

But if we weren’t Cub Scout…

A Fireman I would be!  Up the ladder, spray the fire, chop, chop, chop! CRASH

A Fireman I would be!  Jump lady, jump!  Whoo-ooah!  GOTCHA!

An EMT I would be!  Patch em up, load em up, watch their vital signs!

A Doctor I would be!  Turn around! Drop your pants! This won’t hurt a bit! OUCH

A Doctor I would be!  Take a pill; pay my bill!  I’m going golfing!

A Dispatcher I would be!  Who needs help? Where are you?  Don’t’ hand up the phone!

An Electrician I would be!  Positive, Negative, turn on the juice-ZZZT!

An Electrician I would be!  AC, DC, Plug it in the wall!  ZAP!

An Ambulance Driver I would be!  Swerve to the right, swerve to the left, watch out for the     cars!

A Plumber I would be!  Plunge it!  Flush it!  Look out below!

A Policeman I would be!  Are you lost?  Can I help?  Stop in the name of the law!

A Gasman I would be!  Dig it up, patch the leak.  Please don’t light that match!

A Carpenter I would be!  6 by 8, 2 by 4!  Nail it to the floor!  Whack!

A Bricklayer I would be!  Two bricks. Four bricks.  Six bricks to mortar!

A DJ I would be!  Miles of smiles on the radio dial!

A Teacher I would be!  Sit down, shut up, throw away the gum!

A Teacher I would be!  Do your homework, here’s a ton!  Everybody having fun?

An Engineer I would be!  Push the button, push the button, kick the darn machine!

A Laundry Worker I would be!  Starchy here, starchy there, starchy in your underwear!

A Cashier I would be!  Twenty-nine, forty-nine, here is you change, sir!

A Gym Teacher I’d be!  We must, we must, improve our muscles!

A Medic I would be!  To care for others, to care for others is a must!

A Cook I would be!  Mix it, bake it, heartburn-BURP!

An Ice Cream Maker I would be!  Tutti-fruit, tutti-fruit, nice ice cream!

A Birdwatcher I would be!  Hark! A lark!  Flying through the park! SPLAT!

A Hippie I would be!  Love! Peace! My hair is full of grease!

A Stewardess I would be!  Coffee, tea, or milk sir!  Here’s your paper bag! BLEECCH!

A Cowboy I would be!  Round ‘em up!  Round ‘em up!  Yecch!  Cow Pie!

A Cubmaster I would be!  You do this!  You do that!  I’ll go take a nap!