SKITS

Harlem Globetrotters
Northwest Suburban Council

Three scouts are doing laundry, each is sitting behind a bucket which holds his "laundry". Two of the buckets really have water and a rag or two.  All three work at scrubbing and wringing water from their laundry for a few seconds.  One sitting on the end shakes the water from his hands getting his neighbor slightly wet.  This provokes the scout in the middle who retaliates with a splash back, escalate in comedic fashion till the one on the end throws a wet rag at the face of the "scout" in the middle who ducks.  The rag sails on till it smacks the scout on the far end (previously not involved in the water fight) in the face.  The smack-ee picks up his bucket to dump on the others who take flight into the audience.

The Punch line: When the actors are in the crowd the smack-ee tosses the contents of his bucket in a wide arc over as much of the audience as possible. In the version I saw the bucket was filled with pieces of newspaper but in a Scouting setting a bucket full of leaves would work just a well.  If the actors have a little talent and practice this can be extremely funny.

 

The Great Seal
Heart of America Council

Personnel: 5 Cubs

Cub 1: Bet you never heard of the Great Seal of the United States.

Cub 2: You lose, I certainly have heard of it.

Cub 1: OK, I’ll bet you don’t know where to find a picture of it.

Cub 2: You win.  Where?

Cub 1: On a dollar bill.  Look, (Holds up a dollar bill.)

Cub 2: You mean the picture of George Washington?

Cub 1: No, turn the bill over and look at the two circular designs.

Cub 2: That’s the Great Seal?  Why are there two designs?

Cub 1: That’s the front and back of the Great Seal, like the front and backside of a coin.

Cub 3: What do the designs mean?

Cub 1: First there is the eagle.  That’s our National symbol.  The shield over the eagle’s breast has 13 stripes.

Cub 4: For the 13 original states?

Cub 1: Right.

Cub 5: (Looking at bill) what’s the eagle holding in his bill?

Cub 1: It’s a ribbon with the word  “E Pluribus Unum” which is Latin for “One from Many.”

Cub 4: Meaning one nation from many states?

Cub 1: Right.

Cub 3: What’s the eagle holding in his claws?

Cub 2: I know.  There is an olive branch, the symbol of peace, with 13 leaves.

Cub 4: And he’s holding 13 arrows in the other claw, which means that we intend to defend our freedom.

Cub 1: Do you know why the eagle is facing right?

Cub 2: It means that peace is right.  Peace is first.

Cub 3: What does the pyramid mean?

Cub 1: The pyramid is the symbol of strength and lasting power.  But notice that it’s flat on top—unfinished.  That means the nation is unfinished.  We still have a big job ahead.

Cub 4: What is that triangular eye above the pyramid?

Cub 5: I think it represents God watching over us.

Cub 3: Gosh, I never realized there was so much crammed into the Great Seal.

Cub 1: And I’ll bet you never realized it was right there on the $1 bill.

 

America
Heart of America Council

Characters: 7 Cubs, 6 wearing costumes depicting themes related to the states.  All seven carrying a letter spelling out America

Rhode Island: Small in size, large in heart,
Freedom of worship gave us our start;
One of the original thirteen,
Home of Roger Williams and Nathaniel Greene;
Many Americans daily are fed,
By our state bird, the Rhode Island Red.

Mississippi: Look away, look away, Dixieland
Many brave men at Tupelo and Vicksburg took their stand;
Magnolias still bloom and mockingbirds still sing,
But the Natchez Trace with voices no longer ring.

Colorado: First came the real mountain men,
The trappers and traders
Then gold seekers and railroaders;
Finally coal miners gave way to skiers and oil,
John Denver sought and Robert Redford still seeks to save our soil.

Idaho: The River of No Return halted Lewis & Clark temporarily,
Traders, farmers and sheepherders
followed their trail merrily;
Today, tourists gaze in awe
at the wonders they saw,

And even eat our famous potatoes raw!

Arizona: Navajo, Hopi, Apache,
were led by Cochise and Geronimo;
Our large Indian population
continues to help us grow;
Copper, cotton, cattle, citrus and climate are the "C's"
That have proven to be economic key.

Alaska: North to Alaska was the cry,
Gold fever was the reason why;
Seward's Folly was no more,
But it was 1959 before America officially opened its door;
The Alcan highway was the first link,
The pipeline added strength.

(Boys look for the missing letter)

"E": Isn't this neat?
Without me there is no America.

I represent Everyone,
And that's what makes America complete

(Boys line up in proper order AM_RICA then E comes on last.)

Brain Shop
Skits-a-mazoo

Cast:  Customer, Shopkeeper

Setting:  Brain Shop

 

Customer:  Hi!  I'm bored with myself.  I'd like to buy a new brain and have an all-new personality.

Shopkeeper:  (In one of those evil, horror movie voices)  Ahh, yes.  Well, I can sell you this brain from Billy Crystal for $5000.  Here.  Try it.  ("Unscrews" head and plops in pretend brain.)  How do you feel?

Customer:  (In Billy Crystal style voice) Marvelous.  I ... feel marrrvelous.  But I don't think it's me.  Can I try another?

Shopkeeper:  Okay.  Let me see.  (Rummages around.)  Let's try this one.  It's the brain from Captain Kirk.  Only $5000.

Customer:  (In Kirk voice)  "Scotty, can you fix those transporters?  No, a bit too famous for me."

Shopkeeper:   Sure.  I'll go out back.  (Rummages around in back of store.)  Here's one from Ronald Reagan.  It only costs $5000.  How do you feel?

Customer:  (In Ronald Reagan style voice)  "Well, Bonzo, stop that".. I think that this one's still a bit too famous for me.

Shopkeeper:  Hmmmm.  A tough customer.  I'll have to go down to the basement. I'll be back.  (Customer comments on the kind of brains he has gotten and what kind he'll get next.)  Ahhh, here we are.  The best in the house, not famous at all.  I guarantee you'll love it.  Only $15000.  (Yes, $15000.)

Customer:  (Imitates a leader in the crowd for some notorious act, such as putting up the sign and calling out "PACK!" or admonishing the kids or doing a famous routine or the like.)  Hmmm, this is good.  But I recognize it.  No, wait, it's (Insert name of person.)  I love it!  But tell me the brains of those three famous people only cost $5000 apiece.  This one, however, comes from a virtually unknown, unimportant person.  Why does it cost $15000?

Shopkeeper:  Well, it's never been used!

 

Climb That
Skits-a-mazoo

Two Scouts meet, and the first scout begins to brag he can climb anything.

Scout 1:  "Can you climb that tree?" 

Scout 2  "Sure I've done it lots of times."

Scout 1 "Can you climb the steep hill over there?"

Scout 2 "No sweat, no problem for me."

Scout 1  "How about the Empire State Building?" 

Scout 2  "Done it, Did it."

Scout 1 "How about Mount Everest?" 

Scout 2  "Boy that was I cold day, I've done that too.  I told you I am the world's greatest climber, I can climb anything!"

Scout 1  "I'll bet you ten bucks I can show you something that you can't climb." 

Scout 2  "Your on!"

Scout 1 pulls out a flashlight and shine the beam up into the sky  "all right climb that!"

Scout 2  "Are you crazy? No Way!" 

Scout 1 "I knew you would back out, now pay up!"

Scout 2  "I won't pay because it's not fair.  I know you, I'd start climbing and I'd get half way and you'd turn the flashlight off!"