SKITS

Ice Fishing Skit I
Heart of America Council

Characters: 2 fishermen, little boy. All three have a stick with a short string on it as a fishing rod.

(Or several fishermen in one boat and one in another.  You can enlarge group so all boys in your den get a part)

Scene: Two boys with "fishing rods" are standing together fishing through the ice.  The rods hang without moving, as the boys are not catching anything.

Boy 1: Boy, am I cold. I don't know how I let you talk me into coming out in the middle of the night to go ice fishing. My feet are frozen to the ice, my nose is running, my ears are like ice, and I haven't even had a bite.

Boy 2: Knock it off! This is a great spot! Just wait till we catch a few.

(Boys stand a few seconds with no bites.)

Boy 1: It's 2:00 AM and we still haven't had a bite. I think my right ear just fell off.

Boy 2: Stop complaining! Soon they'll start biting; just wait.

Boy 1: (after a short wait) 3:00AM and still no bites! My other ear just fell off.

Boy 2: Wait! Wait!

Boy 1: Talk louder, my ears fell off.

Boy 2: Cut that out!!!

(Another boy walks onto the stage at some distance from the other two.  He begins to fish, and catches one after another.)

Boy 1: It's 4:00 AM; my toes just fell off.  I have to go to the bathroom, but I can't afford to have anything else fall off. We still haven't had a single bite.  (Watches as the new boy catches more fish.) Say Charlie, that kid over there. (points) Look at all the fish he's getting!

Boy 2: Wow I wonder how he does it?  (raises his voice) HEY-KID!

Boy 3: MMMMMMMM

Boy 2: You're catching fish over there, aren't you?

Boy 3: UMMM HUMM. (Nods his head and catches another fish.)

Boy 2: You got more than ten-don't you?

Boy 3: MMMMMMMMMM (Nods his head.)

Boy 2: How do you do it?  We've been fishing here for hours without a bite, while you get them one after the other.

Boy 3: MMM MMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMM

Boy 2: What?

Boy 3: MMMMM MMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMM

Boy 2: I can't hear you.

Boy 3: MMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMM

Boy 2: I don't understand you! What are you trying to say?

Boy 3: (Loudly spits a large something into his hand.) YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE WORMS WARM!!!
(Puts the worms back in his mouth.)

Ice Fishing Skit II
Baloo’s Archives

Cast:        At least 3 scouts or 2 scouts and adult

               One scout (or the adult) offstage playing God's voice.

Set Up:    2 scouts are going ice fishing and they walk to center stage.

Cub #1:    This looks like a good spot to go ice fishing

Cub #2:    Yes, let's start here, then.

(Cub #2 starts using a manual ice drill to
 cut through the ice.)

God's Voice:      There are no fish there!
(Cubs jump and look around.)

Cub #3:    Let's try over there.

Cub #4:    Okay, you drill the hole this time.

(Cub #3 takes the drill and they move to a new location
and stars to drill through the ice.)

God's Voice:      There are no fish there!
(Cubs jump and look around.)

Cub #5:    Golly, we better try a different spot,  I guess

Cub #6:    Yes, that looks pretty good over there.

(Cub #5 takes the drill and they move to a new location
 and start to drill through the ice.)

God's Voice:      Listen, you guys, this is an ice skating rink and I'm the ice rink manager and THERE ARE NO FISH HERE

Taking Penguins for a Ride

Baloo’s Archives

Cast:       "Penguin Keeper", penguins, police officer

Set Up:    A man with a busload of penguins chugs across the stage. Or a person leading a line of boys walking (waddling) like penguins walks across stage
A police officer stops the leader

Police:     "Where are you taking these penguins?"

Leader:    "I'm taking them to the beach."

Police:     Why don’t you take them to the zoo instead?

Leader     Good Idea!!

The leader changes direction, and
goes off stage with the penguins.

Shortly the leader returns back on stage with the penguins.

The police officer stops him again

Police:     "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo!"

Leader:    "I did!!  They had a great time. Now I'm taking them to the movies."

Penguin Soup Skit

Heart of America Council

Cast:     4 or more scouts (scouts stand in line except for Leader.)

LEADER:   Den ATTENTION! (scouts snap to attention.)

LEADER:   This Den is the BEST Den in the troop! To become the best, we have practiced our skills, gotten lots of exercise and sleep, and most importantly gotten great nutrition! We have discovered the one food source that makes us the BEST! (faces scout #1.)

LEADER:   Scout! What did you have for breakfast?

Scout #1:     Penguin soup, sir!

LEADER:   That's right! Penguin soup is the best way to start the day! (faces scout #2.)

LEADER:   Scout! What did you have for lunch?

Scout #2:     Penguin soup, sir!

LEADER:   That's right! Penguin soup is the best way to keep up your energy on those long day hikes! (faces scout #3.)

LEADER:   Scout! What did you have for supper?

Scout #3:     Penguin soup, sir!

LEADER:   That's right! Penguin soup keeps our bodies strong all night long!

LEADER:   So, Den, what do we eat for breakfast?

All Scouts: Penguin soup, sir!

LEADER:   So, Den, what do we eat for lunch?

All Scouts: Penguin soup, sir!

LEADER:   So, Den, what do we eat for supper?

All Scouts: Penguin soup, sir!

LEADER:   That's right. Left face! Forward, march! (Entire line of scouts waddles like penguins offstage.)

HAPPINESS IS—MISERY IS (Skit)
Great Salt Lake Council

CAST:     2 to 8 Cub Scouts, or more. Cubs alternate,
first boy says, “HAPPINESS is…,”
second boy says, “MISERY is…”)

PROPS: Hold up cards or cardboard cutouts (painted) of smiling and sad faces that boys can make themselves.

1ST CUB:   HAPPINESS IS…hearing your Dad has won an all expense paid trip to Hawaii.

2ND CUB: MISERY IS…when you find out that the trip is for two and you have to stay home with a baby-sitter.

1ST CUB:   HAPPINESS IS…when your Dad drives you to school in his brand new car and all your friends are there to see you.

2ND CUB: MISERY IS…when you get out and the door falls off and lands on your toes.

1ST CUB:   HAPPINESS IS…when your Mom takes you and your friends for a ride in her new convertible with the top down.

2ND CUB: MISERY IS…when it starts to rain cats and dogs and the top won’t go up.

1ST CUB:   HAPPINESS IS…when you are flying in outer space in a big space ship and you are in command.

2ND CUB: MISERY IS…waking up with a big headache after you have fallen out of bed from the top bunk.

1ST CUB:   HAPPINESS IS…getting to do it yourself—build your own motorcycle kit and your Dad is going to help you put it together.

2ND CUB: MISERY IS…opening the box and finding the instructions are in a foreign language.

1ST CUB:   HAPPINESS IS…getting a bike for your birthday.

2ND CUB: MISERY IS…when you find it has three wheels.

Limericks of the World
San Gabriel Valley, Verdugo Hills, Long Beach Area

Personnel: Each boy may read one limerick or Leader may read as boys pretend to be World Scouts

Cub #1: We are a den with a skit,
about customs other countries do fit
In limerick we’ll tell you,
What Scouts around the world do,
Although we’ve stretched the truth a bit

Cub #2: There once was a Scout from Peru,
Who watched his mom making stew
Because once by mistake,
In an oven she did bake,
His birthday cake out of glue

Cub #3: There was a Cub Scout in France,
Who taught little ducklings to dance
When he said, “Tap, Tap!”
They only said, “Quack”,
What ducky dances they have in France

Cub #4: There once was a Cub Scout in Florence,
Who hated Christmas mutton with abhorrence
He found a dead buzzard,
And fried him in mustard,
Then served him for dinner in Florence

Cub #5: There was a Cub in Hong Kong,
Who never did anything wrong
He’d lay on his back,
With his head in a sack,
Singing an old Cub Scouting song

Cub #6: There once was a Cub Scout in Nice,
Whose friends were usually geese
They walked out together,
In all sorts of weather,
That’s the custom of Cub Scouts in Nice

Cub #7: In America there are Cub Scouts, too
With their own funny customs to do
Their dens yells are extreme,
No one’s heard such a scream,
Cause they yell till their faces turn blue