On The Most Wanted List
Denver Area Council

The Israeli police were looking for a man named Joseph, wanted for looting in the port city of Haifa. The suspect was described as the son of a Barcelona ex-nun and a German father. He was a former flutist, and he worked occasionally as a farmer. In short, he was "A Haifa-lootin', flutin' Teuton, son of a nun from Barcelona, part-time plowboy Joe.

I used this skit a few months back. It was sent to me again and I think it works well with this theme. Thanks, Mike.

Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a camping and hiking trip. They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see? "Well, I see thousands of stars."
"And what does that mean to you?"
"Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?"
"To me, it means someone has stolen our tent."

Crime Doesn't Pay
San Francisco Bay Area

(Driver pretends to be driving the bus and pulls up to the first stop. Opens the door.)
Cub #1: Hi. How much is a bus ride?
Driver: 75 cents.
Cub #1: OK. Here you are. (Pretends to drop money in the box. Takes a seat.)
Cub #2: Hi. I'm Tom Crime.
Driver: OK. Take a seat.
Cub #3: Hi. I'm Mike Crime.
Driver: OK. Take a seat.
Cub #1: (Walks up the aisle to the driver) Hey! How come when I got on the bus I had to pay 75 cents and all these other guys get on and they don't have to pay?
Driver: Oh, those guys. That's easy. Everyone know the Crime doesn't pay.

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